Christmas 2007

I am so disappointed at how commercialized Christmas has become, especially when it begins on Halloween! Somehow the true meaning of Christmas has passed us by and it seems to be about presents and decorations. How many people go into debt each year to provide Christmas gifts and then spend all year paying it back to do it all over again?

I know that some of my friends are disappointed in me that I have asked that we not exchange gifts, but I honestly don't NEED more stuff. I want to celebrate birthdays and the birthday person one on one. One friend and I usually donate some time to the YWCA helping with whatever and then we have dinner together. We weren't able to do it this year due to many work commitments this year.

The coolest thing I got to do this Christmas was to do a last minute Sub for Santa. A friend of mine called me about 3:30 on Christmas Eve and told me about a family that she knew that wasn't going to have Christmas for their daughter because money was tight. We threw together stuff that we had that was new or gently used and wrapped it up and filled stockings with treats. It was such a good feeling to know that this child was going to have something to open on Christmas morning.

I just read a book called "The Christmas Jars" by Jason F. Wright. (Rising newspaper reporter Hope Jensen uncovers the secret behind the "Christmas Jars"--glass jars filled with coins and bills anonymously given to people in need. But Hope discovers much more than she bargained for when some unexpected news sets off a chain reaction of kindness and brings about a Christmas Eve wish come true.) It is going to be one of my new traditions for 2008.

I went to my Farnsworth Family Festivity on Christmas Eve and had a wonderful time dispite the snowstorm we had...I think a good time was had by all.

Christmas Day I had told my mom that I would cook a turkey dinner since I was away at Thanksgiving. So I got all the stuff and invited a couple of friends to join us. For years I have cooked BIG (25-30 pounds) turkeys when it was my turn to cook for Thanksgiving (we have now gotten smart and there are two smaller turkeys), but I haven't done a small one until now. It was just under 13 pounds. Got the stuffing made and the turkey in the ovening thinking about 4 hours to cook. Made the cranberry relish recipe that I got from the Heller side of my family. Check the turkey at 1:30, looked good.

Called the friends and said dinner would be at 2:30...oops turkey was done 15 minutes later and before I had had a chance to take off the roaster lid to brown it properly. Well the stuffing pan won't fit it with the turkey, darn, so I have to pull out the turkey and put it on the washer as I have no room in the kitchen. I'm now racing to start the mashed potatoes. After I have peeled them I am cutting them into small pieces so they will cook faster and I stab myself in the finger with the knife. OUCH!!! Managed not to bleed on anything until I get the bandage. OUCH!!! Next is the green beans with mushrooms and almond slivers in butter.

All in all it turned out okay and everyone thought it was pretty good (at least I think so?)...I even made homemade gravy for the first time all by myself (with a little telephone assistance from my aunt Linda). Mom went home and my friends and I watch "Little Miss Sunshine". I really enjoyed it!

I hope your Christmas was blessed with family, friends, food and fun!!

Okay folks, that's all for now!! I hope you all know how loved you are and how much you mean to me!

Oh, Sweet Charity -- "It's for the Children"

Every year the Primary Children's Medical Center has a fund raiser called The Festival of Trees. Trees of every size are decorated and donated to raise funds for the children. There are all sorts of wonderful things there, a gift boutique, centerpieces, gingerbread houses and wreaths.

I go every year on opening night because it's less crowded and you get to bid on things. I take my mom and we wander around. We both found things to bid on...she a centerpiece and I a small ceramic angel that started at $10. I made the first bid and came back a short while later and someone had bid $15, so I went to $20 and left. I came back and the bid was $25, so I bid $26 and left again. When I came back "she" was there raising the bid to $30, so I bid $31 and spoke with her telling her how much I liked the angel and it had blue in it which is my favorite color, etc. So she pats me on the arm and says I can have it and isn't wonderful what they do for the children. So I get it!

On December 10th, I was doing a little shopping to finish up what I needed for my sorority group party. I had run into the dollar store and what was the first thing I saw...a shelf filled with my precious angel..."It's for the children", I kept repeating as I called my friend and laughed hysterically. I can't believe someone donated something from the dollar store!!! And I paid $31 for it...

I Have Been Fired...

by my Financial Planner. How sad is that? Your financial planner fires you because you use your IRA as an emergency fund...

So unless or when I am actually in shape to SAVE money I can't have my IRA through his company. He feels he has enabled me (ALL these years) and so we're having an intervention...to stop the MADNESS of paying the early withdrawal fees. He's just trying to save me money and to save his company in case of an audit. I really don't blame him, it just made me a little sad that my whole world knows I can't manage my money and I have been fired. Wow! How many people can say that? He might take me back WHEN I win Publisher's Clearing House!!!

And of course, now I have to tell my boss and he knows how long I have been trying to work on my finances (soon to be 25 years)...the good news is that I have a home that is mine (as long as I make the payments), a car that runs, one credit card and I am healthy enough to have two jobs!!! WOOHOO!!!

I'm not sure I want to be a grown-up...(obviously I'm not being a very good one), but I guess I will worry about it tomorrow!!!

Happiness is a Way of Traveling, Not a Destination

I subscribe to several "helpful" emails. I thought I would share this one...


Welcome to this issue of "Dr. T's Timely Tips" by Dr. Tony Alessandra. Please send your feedback to Tony@Alessandra.com!

Happiness is a Way of Traveling, Not a Destination

The only advantage of being a pessimist is that all your surprises are pleasant. But that's pretty small change compared to the big payoff that comes from projecting positive expectations.

Much of our happiness or unhappiness is caused, of course, not by what happens, but how we look at what happens. In other words, by our thinking habits. And habits can be changed.

George Walther, in his book Power Talking, shows how you can foster the mindset that interprets setbacks as positive opportunities. He believes this is a skill that you can develop - one word, one phrase, one sentence at a time.

For starters, purge the words "I failed ..." from your vocabulary, Walther urges. Replace them with "I learned ..." to help your mind focus on the lessons involved.

Similarly, you might want to get in the habit of using "challenge" when others would say "problem," "I'll be glad to" instead of "I'll have to," and "I'm getting better at ..." rather than "I'm no good at ..."

The subliminal effect of changing even a few words, Walther says, can prompt your mind to come up with creative solutions rather than dreading or fleeing the problem.

Here's to more personal insight, www.alessandra.com

Share these ideas with others at work and in your personal life. Being a mentor and helping others is one of the most rewarding things you will ever do. They may get their own free subscription by going to http://www.alessandra.com/abouttony/timely_tips_signup.asp

Let it Go (for 2004)...by Bishop T. D. Jakes

I thought this message was very powerful, because letting go can be one of the hardest things we do in life. It made so much sense to me especially in 2004 when I first read it and helped me make a serious decision...and it still has meaning for me three years later.

Let it Go (for 2004)...by Bishop T. D. Jakes

There are people who can walk away from you. And hear me when I tell you this! When people can walk away from you; let them walk. I don't want you to try to talk another person into staying with you, loving you, calling you, caring about you, coming to see you, staying attached to you. I mean hang up the phone. When people can walk away from you let them walk. Your destiny is never tied to anybody that left. The bible said that, they came out from us that it might be made manifest that they were not for us. For had they been of us, no doubt they would have continued with us. [1 John 2:19]

People leave you because they are not joined to you. And if they are not joined to you, you can't make them stay. Let them go. And it doesn't mean that they are a bad person, it just means that their part in the story is over. And you've got to know when people's part in your story is over so that you don't keep trying to raise the dead. You've got to know when it's dead. You've got to know when it's over. Let me tell you something. I've got the gift of good-bye. It's the tenth spiritual gift, I believe in good-bye. It's not that I'm hateful, it's that I'm faithful, and I know whatever God means for me to have He'll give it to me. And if it takes too much sweat I don't need it. Stop begging people to stay. Let them go!!

If you are holding on to something that doesn't belong to you and was never intended for your life, then you need to...LET IT GO!!!

If you are holding on to past hurts and pains...LET IT GO!!!

If someone can't treat you right, love you back, and see your worth...LET IT GO!!!

If someone has angered you...LET IT GO!!!

If you are holding on to some thoughts of evil and revenge...LET IT GO!!!

If you are involved in a wrong relationship or addiction...LET IT GO!!!

If you are holding on to a job that no longer meets your needs or talents...LET IT GO!!!

If you have a bad attitude...LET IT GO!!!

If you keep judging others to make yourself feel better...LET IT GO!!!

If you're stuck in the past and God is trying to take you to a new level in Him...LET IT GO!!!

If you are struggling with the healing of a broken relationship...LET IT GO!!!

If you keep trying to help someone who won't even try to help themselves...LET IT GO!!!

If you're feeling depressed and stressed...LET IT GO!!!

If there is a particular situation that you are so used to handling yourself and God is saying "take your hands off of it," then you need to...LET IT GO!!!

Let the past be the past. Forget the former things, GOD is doing a new thing (for 2004!!! and any year after that.)

LET IT GO!!! "The Battle is the Lord's!"

Dancing with the Stars

I have been watching this for several years now and am amazed at the quality most of the stars are able to perform with their partners. There are also those you know immediately that you want to see gone. For this season I am rooting for Cameron and Marie, I expect that Sabrina and Helio will be in the top three and I can't guess the third one right now, I can hope that Cameron or Marie will be there...I guess it will depend on the fan base for all of them!
On a more personal note, I'd love to find a man to learn to dance with or one who already knows how to dance and will teach me, especially the latin dances!

Cat Tale of 2000 - Written in January 2001

There are some things I have sent out and you know about them, newer friends don't and might get a chuckle out of them, this is one of them...

Dear Family and Friends,

Happy New Year!

Some of you got Christmas cards and some of you didn't. For those that didn't, my sincere apology. Some of you have heard my tale (tail) of woe and some of you have not...

Being the person that I am, I had been feeding the neighborhood cat population (Cindy's Kitty Cafe). There was a cat that I did not know and he had been coming around for quite awhile. Not exactly the friendly type and quite nervous, but I tried to be as calm and as kind as I could be. I think he was finally getting use to me, I had actually managed to pet him while he ate one day. I know, you should never try to handle a male while he's eating. But I thought we were making progress and having a relationship...silly me.

On the 14th of December I decided that he needed to be adopted before the really cold weather hit. Well you all know that I have a 19 year cat and I certainly couldn't bring him in until he was checked out by the vet. So there I was before work, bribing him with turkey slices and getting closer and closer to the cat carrier. Then being one who lacks a lot of patience I decided to help him into the cat carrier. WRONG! Quick as a whip he grabbed my right index finger and bit me like there was no tomorrow. OUCH! and a few other well chosen (or not so well chosen) words escaped my lips. At this point it was a lost cause and I needed to go to work. So I washed my finger in hot water and soap and dumped half a bottle of peroxide on it and went to work.

I did all the right things and went for a tetanus shot. I mean really, I've been bit by a cat before, how much trouble can one cat create. Well, the next morning my finger is swollen and red and hurts like..., so off I go to the instacare place. Bad news...cats have the worst bites,then humans and then dogs. Oh great, now they tell me.

So I have to have intravenous antibiotics right then and I have to come back that night for more and then again on Saturday morning. Ok, so that's not too bad, three doses and I'm better. Piece of cake, right? Not even!

I go back that night at 8:00 to get dose #2 and at that point the doctor determines after marking my hand and watching the infection move a 1/4 inch in 30 minutes that maybe I need a hand doctor. So off they send me to the hospital emergency room (on a Friday night no less, but surprisingly I didn't have a very long wait). The doctor sees me and tells me I need to be admitted and am probably going to have surgery the next day. All because I got bit by a cat...

I was in the hospital for six days (I know people who've had open heart surgery that were out in three days). I hurt my mother's feelings, because I'm feeling really stupid and guilty that it's the weekend before Christmas and I'm keeping her from doing what she needs to do and I keep telling her to go and all she wants to do is be with me (I don't realize at the time how serious the infection is).

I have to admit I have THE best mother in the world. When I finally got out on the 21st, she stayed with me until Christmas day and was the best nurse. I was released with a pickline to give myself the intravenous antibiotics three times a day for another seven days, plus having to take an oral antibiotic once a day.

Now you're all probably wondering what happened to the cat (or not, but I'm going to tell you anyway). Animal Control came out the night I went to the hospital and put out a cat trap. He slept around it but never went in until I came home from the hospital and we had a talk. I told him how sorry I was for what had happened and what was going to happen and that I knew he hadn't meant to hurt me. He was in the cat trap the next morning. Animal control came to get him and I cryed all day, we figure that he was very sick and thank heavens he didn't have rabies. But he is now in kitty heaven chasing butterflies and rolling in catnip and having a much better time than he had here on earth. At least it makes me feel better to believe that!

And my saga continues, I am back on oral antibiotics and have to have physical therapy to get my finger back to "normal". I hope this happens really soon! I can hardly wait to see what 2001 brings to me! But hey, I'm always good for a laugh...it's why you all keep me around! Here's hoping that your holidays were much more fun than mine and that you have a wonderful 2001.

I appreciate having you all in my life, for your love, your friendship and your emails!
Beware of strays...

Love to all!

A Reason, A Season, or A Lifetime

I didn't write this one either...just wanted to share...

People come into your life for a Reason, a Season or a Lifetime. When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person.

When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend and they are. They are the REASON you need them to be. Then, without any wrong doing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to share, grow or learn. They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it, it is real. But only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons, things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

Thank you for being a part of my life, whether you were a REASON, a SEASON or a LIFETIME.

The Scars of Life

I did not write this...it was a forward that I liked and wanted to share...

The Scars of Life

Some years ago, on a hot summer day in south Florida, a little boy decided to go for a swim in the old swimming hole behind his house. In a hurry to dive into the cool water, he ran out the back door, leaving behind shoes, socks, and shirt as he went. He flew into the water, not realizing that as he swam toward the middle of the lake, an alligator was swimming toward the shore.

His father working in the yard saw the two as they got closer and closer together. In utter fear, he ran toward the water, yelling to his son as loudly as he could. Hearing his voice, the little boy became alarmed and made a U-turn to swim to his father. It was too late. Just as he reached his father, the alligator reached him. From the dock, the father grabbed his little boy by the arms just as the alligator snatched his legs. That began an incredible tug-of-war between the two. The alligator was much stronger than the father, but the father was much too passionate to let go. A farmer happened to drive by, heard his screams, raced from his truck, took aim and shot the alligator.

Remarkably, after weeks and weeks in the hospital, the little boy survived. His legs were extremely scarred by the vicious attack of the animal. And, on his arms, were deep scratches where his father's fingernails dug into his flesh in his effort to hang on to the son he loved The newspaper reporter who interviewed the boy after the trauma, asked if he would show him his scars. The boy lifted his pant legs. And then, with obvious pride, he said to the reporter, "But look at my arms. I have great scars on my arms, too. I have them because my Dad wouldn't let go."

You and I can identify with that little boy. We have scars, too. No, not from an alligator, but the scars of a painful past. Some of those scars are unsightly and have caused us deep regret. But, some wounds, my friend, are because God has refused to let go. In the midst of your struggle, He's been there holding on to you. The Scripture teaches that God loves you. You are a child of God. He wants to protect you and provide for you in every way But sometimes we foolishly wade into dangerous situations, not knowing what lies ahead.

The swimming hole of life is filled with peril - and we forget that the enemy is waiting to attack. That's when the tug-of-war begins - and if you have the scars of His love on your arms, be very, very grateful. He did not and will not ever let you go. God has blessed you, so that you can be a blessing to others.

You just never know where a person is in his/her life and what they are going through. Never judge another person's scars, because you don't know how they got them. Right now, someone needs to know that God loves them, and you love them, too, enough to not let them go.

God Bless all of us!

Celebrities & Drunk Driving

As I read and listen to the latest news/gossip about Paris, Nicole, Britney and Lindsay...all I can say is if I had as much money as they have and felt the need to drink myself into oblivion, do you think I would be driving myself...

Hellooooo, I don't think so, I would have one gorgeous SOBER driver to take care of me! I do wish them all well and hope they grow up and sober up soon!

Divorce & Marriage Ramblings

Friday, the 19th is the 1st anniversary of my divorce...who would have thunk it? I waited so long to get married and it didn't even survive to my 1st anniversary. Do I regret getting married? No, it was a learning experience and I got a lovely wedding out of it with family there that are no longer with us. But do I consider myself divorced? Nope, it was just a little bump in the road of being single.

(as a side note: I do hate having to fill out forms that ask your marital status and having to use the divorced box...am I lying if I check the single box and who's business is it anyway?)

I was reading an article the other day about "starter husbands". It is the one you marry knowing that it probably won't last, but you do it anyway for whatever reason you think you need to...I want to say that I have now had my "starter husband", but I believe it was my starter and my ender. I am not sure I am cut out to be married to anyone.

I have heard that Katharine Hepburn was quoted as saying "I often wonder whether men and women really suit each other, perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then."

Seems reasonable to me...LOL!!!